I hope that the statement I’m about to make will not be a new revelation to you, but here goes. Born again Christians at times have differences, disputes, and flare-ups, for any number of reasons. Some are theological, some are personal. Some are real, some are imagined. None are excusable inasmuch as they are allowed to sever relationships in Christ’s Body.

In Philippians 4:2, two sisters had a falling out and the Holy Ghost tells Paul to pass on to them this counsel: “be of the same mind in the Lord.” You see, there are two ways of dealing with damaged relationships, hurt feelings, etc. – either in the Lord or in the flesh, either my way or Yahweh’s.

“But, Pastor Ray, you have no idea what they said to me!” I’m sure it wasn’t pretty or nice. However, as a disciple of Jesus Christ, do you have an option not to seek reconciliation or forgiveness? Jesus gave an entire teaching on how many times I should forgive. Your next question might be, “Shouldn’t there be some yardstick that I can use?” Yes – even as God for Christ’s sake forgave you.

Unreconciled differences grieve the power of the Holy Spirit in our lives. You see, it’s the Holy Spirit who prompts us to get things right with one another. God does not want any of His children getting even. Someone may choose to consider you an enemy, but purpose to do what Jesus said – love them. That same reference says that if someone hates your guts, do good to them.

In a practical sense, our development spiritually depends upon our willingness to forgive others. The flesh requires reasons to forgive; the spirit requires the cross. When a person harbors an unforgiving attitude, they leave behind a trail of bitterness and strife. Most people repeatedly run from valuable lessons because of their “eye for eye” view of Scripture.

The Jesus way to reconcile is our pattern. He took the initiative to heal a damaged relationship. He laid down His life. Can you lay down your pride? That fleshly pride is the root of all relationship problems.

Take that problem relationship into your prayer closet today. Ask God what He wants you to do. Be obedient to Him. By His Spirit, extend goodness to that “no-good so-and-so”. Who knows but that they’ll change! It worked for you. Grace extends the freedom to all to repent unconditionally. Even if they don’t receive it, it will certainly set you free.